in five short weeks...

I'll know how you look. Your smell will be so familiar and you will have had a million kisses.

Your picture is on our freezer and every time I see your little cheeks and the top of your head I can't wait to snuggle with you for the first time and get to know my little baby girl.

Your big brother talks about you all the time. He loves to look at your sonogram pictures and ask when you will be out of my tummy. He has certain cars he is willing to share with you and he even said you can ride the honking car.

We are all preparing for you. It seems like a lifetime before you are here but time is flying by also and it seems like we are running out of time.

I love you, my little baby girl, even though I haven't even met you yet.

I'll miss having you inside me. Lately you have been coming out one side when I lay down, while kicking my hip bone on the other side. You like to move your hand or foot across my belly button, sometimes with a lot of force, but mommy doesn't mind. I think you like us being up all night because thats when you move the most. When your Daddy is around and talking you like to kick sporadically almost like you're trying to get his attention.

You have a very excited family, all waiting for you.

Hurry up and pass the next five weeks!!!

cutting the strings

Tomorrow I am going to church alone. I get to go to the new place to hear their pastor speak. I cannot describe how good it feels to be free of the old one. Every time I think of having to go back there I feel the anger coming on.

So, anyway. My mom is going to kill me. She sent me some stuff from the motherhood maternity store and I exchanged it. She always thinks I need a night gown and I hate them. I cannot sleep with that thing wrapped around me, so I took it back and got some stuff I need.

I don't mean to be ungrateful, but I always have to have a system and truthfully, I don't want any gifts because I have a list in my head of things I need and things I don't need or want and I'm just so overwhelmed with it all I don't have room up there for other things.

I know, I'm selfish and rude. :(

Today I shoved a fork up my thumbnail and it still hurts like crazy. I was so annoyed because I was trying to unload the dishwasher and I was so distracted by the kids that I wasn't paying attention and of course they didn't care that I was hurt they just followed me into the bathroom asking for more food and it just drove me crazy. I'm going to go insane when the girls are out of school for two weeks!!

So all we have left is Christmas, then I only have two weeks of work then two weeks before my baby girl is here. I was awake for a little bit last night and she was moving all around so I was rubbing my belly. I think I can feel her elbows and knees sometimes, theres just a little corner that separates into two parts inside me and sometimes she will be still when I'm rubbing where she is and it feels like we're already bonding.

I'm getting really excited for her to come, almost moreso than for Christmas.

Tonight I have been cooking dinner for an hour, and I'm ready to be done!! I made lemon chicken and corn, with baked apples and sponge cake for dessert.

I used to make the cake all the time when we were first married, and I loved it. I'm excited for it to be done tonight.

Besides that, I washed 5 loads of clothes so we have stuff to wear for the cold week ahead. I'm excited for the colder weather, finally!!

first blog of December

Yesterday, my Christmas shopping began. What an exciting time!

I usually shop online but the stores with free shipping were out of everything I knew I wanted so I had to get out of the house for a while.

Here's the rundown: I went to toys r us and got jake the speed racer helmet and steering wheel that make noise, and let see, oh a mach 6 with a movie scene inside this little view finder thing, and a double pack of the mach 5 and racer x cars, a sponge bob bath set, and a speed racer light up poncho, and I think that might be it, besides the video game which I think I already mentioned previously.

Sage got a dish set, glow station, drawing pad with colored pencils and paint brushes with paint inside, socks with the individual toes, since I lost my (old) ones as soon as she found them... and one of those bath sets with the soap and stuff. Thats all I remember right now...

I got Mycah two Junie B books, dishes, Hannah Montana brush set, the same paint brushes as Sage but a different coloring book, a Hannah Montana dress up set, Prince Caspian (movie) and something else I can't remember right now lol.

I figured since I was given the opportunity to shop I might as well get some things for #4, so I got her an outfit, a sheet and blanket set that is the tiddlywinks ladybug theme, some soap diapers and wipes.

So I spent about 10 total hours walking around Target Friday, including work the night before.

I have ot say that I was not looking forward to Thursday night at work, I thought about calling out so many times but since I missed a day last week, I couldn't do it. The night turned out fine, even though it was someone I usually don't get along with mixed with two trucks. I was proud of myself that night because although I was in stationery until about 7:15 or so, it only took me about 4 hours to push it all. It was one of those nights where the repacks kept coming so I had very little time to start pushing, I remembered from my last mistake and got two pallets for backstock, and by the time my offsite came and I sorted out all the sporting goods from my repacks (urrgh) and the few boxes of Christmas, it was break time. Then I put the backstock I did manage to get during the truck unload on a pallet and did half a cart of pens and it was lunch, so by the time I got started it was almost 5 and I was done about two hours later.

About 6, Karli was ready to go. I had this bump right under my rib cage that was her bootie I guess, but she was sticking out in such a way that I couldn't bend forward, so when I was driving if I was going to turn right, like at my exit, it was near impossible to lean forward to see around the car that was waiting to turn left. Boy oh boy. But, I have less than 50 days now. I can't believe it. I'm fine with the idea of leaving work for a while, my brain is wrapped around that just fine, but as far as having a baby in the house...nope, not processing.

The whole pregnancy thing seems a little routine and normal, but I am going to have a major kind of thing going on when I can't move for two weeks (basically) and I'll be woken up every few hours to feed someone.

I'm totally looking forward to it, though.

So now for parent teacher conferences:

Sage's went fine. She is a perfectionist and over achiever, which we already knew. The teacher didn't use those words, but I live with her, so take it from me. :) She had 2s, 3s and 4s on everything on her report card.

Mycah had all 1s and 2s. Not so good but I was expecting it. She will never be a perfect student, but thats okay with me.

I don't have a solid stance on education, really. I think some people get it and some don't. Everyone has their own purpose in life and she will do something else great with her life besides making As on her tests.

I was a combination of them two. Well, like Sage I'm still pretty anal about things. One example for her is that she always says "name, color, cut, paste" before she starts her homework, and once she forgot her name and you would have thought the world was about to explode.

But, I never made really good grades. i was always average and never cared to be on the honor rolls or anything of that sort. It seemed to be a lot of work and I wasn't that motivated.

So thats our family update...and now Armando is on...

*yawn*

Thanksgiving was so much fun!

This was the second year that we have gotten to stay home and eat our own food. I'm still wearing my pajamas because it was such a relaxing day lol.

Sage was told the day before that she was required to fill her belly at our feast, and suprisingly she did. I decided long ago that I would never make my kids feel bad for wanting to eat something, especially the girls, but I was wondering if she was ever going to get filled up. I know she had four deviled eggs and 3 or 4 rolls, in addition to her two huge pieces of turkey, two serving of cranberry sauce, huge pile pf mashed potatoes and gravy... and the list goes on. She was so full she ended up laying on her bed watching tv because she couldn't move.

I was looking forward to this three day weekend because of all the stuff I could accomplish but I have not moved except from the couch to the computer and a couple of trips to the kitchen for some yummy leftovers.

I had a dream about my little karli last night and now I can't wait to meet her. No matter that we don't have any diapers for her or a number of other things, I'm just excited to hold her and kiss her. In my dream she looked just like my niece when she was just a few months old. Kylie and Sage were both born really tiny and got big really fast lol. Kylie, though, had a rounder head and strawberry blond hair. I used to talk to her and try to play with her and she would just stare at me, which was pretty much how my dream went.

I was a couple months pregnant with Mycah when I used to babysit her for my sister and she would just look at me or play with something else then cry when it was time for me to go home. She also screamed when my sister tried to leave her with Shaun and I overnight.

Those were the days lol.

When she outgrew that stage it got to where her and Mycah always wanted to be together so she came everywhere with us until we moved.

In other news... I'm trying to figure out if I should keep this or not... I impulsively bought jake a Christmas gift, and I'm just not sure... Its a speed racer video game where he actually sits in the mach 5 and it plugs into the tv. I know he'll like it but I'm not sure if we have the room for it. I guess since Christmas is less than a month away I better decide and start shopping pretty quickly.

I have it all figured out now!

Yesterday was a very interesting day, and in the midst of all the interesting happenings I realized why I hate this place so very much.

EVERYTHING here is complicated.

The day started out simple enough: Worked, got home, took Mycah to school... Sage had her feast, which was cute. They all dressed up as pilgrims or indians and ate food the moms brought in.

Then came my doctors appointment. I left an hour early because I knew the street but not the distance I was going. Shaun somehow talked me into driving the car which I did against my better judgement because that thing is on the brink.

Let me say that in FL, if you want to go somewhere during the school year, during school times, you are usually the only one on the road. Not so here. And of course, to add to my barely working car and 5 million people on the road, there was an accident so traffic was crazy.

I still got there 20 minutes early because it was so easy to find but in truth, I hate new things, new places, and I was very nervous.

So, they got me all checked in, and they were very nice people, but still, new place, new doctor, the one who will be cutting me open in about two months, so yeah I had some anxiety.

All of this lead to my having high blood pressure when they checked. I know thats all it was because until I got really comfortable at SD I had high blood pressure there, too. (and until the first time I got there without something tragic happening to my car)

I tried to tell the doctor this but he insisted that I go to the hospital.

Now for another comparison: my hospital in FL was crazy. You walk into the emergency room and you're stuck there. You go to where the doctors offices were and you're stuck there. Many different entrances that were in no way attached or connected.

Holy cross is not like that at all. I found admissions with no trouble at all and got all checked in. The only problem was that I had no phone and was in a different area code, but they gave me a phone to call my husband since it was 2 1/2 hours after my scheduled appointment and i knew he would be worried.

I was a little peeved that I had to be there because I knew nothing was wrong with me. My blood pressure was fine the whole time and my labs came back completely normal. I was so glad to not be in FL at that time because I knew my mom would have come and my bp would not have been so wonderful. I said a little thank you prayer that my hubby knew to keep the kids at home and just let me make my doctor happy lol.

So, I got the night off work with a note, not that they need it since I never call out, but I didn't sleep at all yesterday until i got home at 8pm so I was glad my boss was so accomodating.

I did have an ultrasound at the hospital to check fluid levels and the girl showed me Karli's face. I never want to lose that image in my mind! She was moving through the whole thing, kicking the wand and changing her whole position. At the end I got to see her finally and she had a chubby face and her mouth was in a big open smile. It made my night.

She weighs 3 lb 13 oz now, so she has tripled her size in just a month or so. Makes me nervous because she still has two solid months to do nothing but gain.

So, that was my day yesterday. I have to go tonight to take all my at home labs to the hospital then tomorrow I have to take the results to my doctor, then Thursday I'm sitting at home and letting Shaun cook and Friday, well, more of the same. Also, insert work and sleep into those days.

My next official appointment is next monday and I'm hoping that everything goes okay and its quick and easy.

nothing good is on

and the kids are fighting.

I would love to have a break. I really would. Just for a few hours, or maybe a couple of minutes with no one talking. Oh that would be nice.

Weeks like this past one are the reason I miss living near family. I remember being able to drop them off places and do my grocery shopping or whatever and it was so nice. Next year the three will all be in school so at least I have that to look forward to.

I talked to a woman at my work who just got back from having her baby and she said they left her (baby) in the room the whole time, and every once in a while a nurse would poke her head in to ask how she was doing.That was the idea I got from my hospital when I looked online. She said she would have liked more time to rest, which makes me wonder because right now I'm looking forward to having karli to myself. We'll see what happens.

Today we went grocery shopping to get our Tg feast. We are going to have some good food that day. I can't wait.

I have to laugh at my neighbors sometimes. Last night I did some laundry and one neighbor replied to my facebook message saying something about the amount I did, then we were talking to another neighbor before we left and she asked if we do a big shopping trip every week so I guess she has seen us these past weeks going grocery shopping.

The second neighbor is the only one I have ever seen carrying groceries in so I guess we go a lot more often than other people lol. But we also have a bigger family.

Tonight is more cleaning. I like doing domestic things. I can't wait until i can quit work and be here full time. Well, in a different "here", but at my house. I have a master list of things to do before K comes and I've done two fo them now, so thats really cool. Only like 300 things left lol

more unwanted opinions

Yesterday, after getting a long look/laugh at Lindsey Lohan getting floured by peta, I decided to do some research.

I've seen the first few seconds of animal cruelty videos, but since I'm not a sociopath I usually don't make it very far into them before deciding to fill my mind with positive images. So, I forced myself to watch this whole video on how fur coats are made and it was sickening. In case there are animal lovers on here I won't go into detail but I will say that there are way more humane ways of doing things.

I am not an animal lover at all, to be honest. I like most of them that aren't mine but living in two bedrooms with three kids makes you glad nothing alive in here poops on the floor. Outside dogs are okay but other than that, I'm good.

I would never want to see anything bad happen to a living thing, though. I believe that humans were put on the earth to have dominion, as the Bible puts it, over the animals and every living thing but skinning a racoon while its kicking to get away is not what God had in mind when he told Adam that.

So my conclusion is that while I would have never worn fur to begin with, I will never become animalistic like some people are to protect them as long as there are babies in their mothers womb being pulled apart with pliers and sucked out. People come first.